Two days ago it was Mothers’ Day. I was halfway through We Need To Talk About Kevin. While friends posted happily on Facebook about their special day celebrating the unique love between a mother and her children, my mind was full of the ‘worst case scenario’.

I had been warned by someone that the book was mostly boring until the end when it was horrific. Someone else told me that that the book was hard work until the last third. But, only halfway through on Sunday, I was affected enough to have a nightmare that night influenced by what I’d read so far.

‘Kevin’ is one of the best books I’ve read. With the exception of the mentions of American politics, I didn’t find it hard work. It’s powerful, disturbing and convincing. Although it’s extreme, I’m grateful that someone has written about motherhood without censoring the unpleasant parts. I get tired of the flawless depictions of motherhood in society and the media. This book is a breath of fresh air.

To try to answer the book’s central question of who was to blame: I think that the problems started because Eva was not willing to deal with a difficult child by putting that child before herself. Yes, Kevin was unpleasant but as a potential parent you have to be prepared to deal with that. (But it’s easy for me to say that since I’m not a parent.) The interactions between Eva and Kevin became a hideous game rather than a mother bringing up her son. I don’t think that that absolves Kevin of all responsibilty for his actions though- even if you’re not as bright as he is, at fifteen you must know, no matter how awful your mother is, that it is wrong to kill.

The most chilling aspect of the book is that Eva is so intelligent and articulate, charming even, but her actions are manipulative and selfish. Kevin takes after his mother, so which of them is the monster?

Lionel Shriver talked about the book for the Guardian book club when ‘Kevin’ was the book of the month.

(12th in 2012)